The older I get, the more I recognize the absurdity of trying to power through things on my own (which I still stubbornly do) for the sake of pride or ego.
You know that old saying, “If you want to go fast go alone; if you want to go far, go together?” So. painfully. true.
I learned this lesson forcefully when I became a mom last year, starting with the moment I went into labor. My exact thoughts before giving birth were along the placid lines of, “I’ll breathe through it,” “Everyone does it,” and “Whatever, it’ll be fine.”
Oh, Jessica. You sweet, naive little rosebud.
I’d received plenty of offers of birth plans, classes, coaches, etc. and naively poo-pooed it all. “I’ve got this,” I told myself, and I guess I did – in a way – but golly, if I’d been less obstinate and let my guard down to take some of that advice and support, things would’ve been a lot less overwhelming.
Same thing during those first few months of parenting. Even with an outpouring of offers of help, even in the throes of post partum depression and anxiety, I still declined help because I wanted to do it myself.
This was dumb.
You know what else was dumb? When I wanted to start working out again after baby, when my whole world was upside down and new, and I thought I could do that on my own, too. I didn’t realize that with the right support, the process would be easier, more effective and FUN. I was fortunate to find this community in the least likely of places (online!) but thank goodness I did.
There’s a beauty in the support we find in the right tribe and community. It creates an environment where we become stronger by showing our weaknesses. We can be ourselves and learn to be brave. That process – the softening of walls we build around ourselves – is vulnerability, and it’s the most amazing thing.
Today, after all the challenges and wonder inspired this past year, I’m thankful to have the opportunity to guide other women through the process of finding their strength. As a health and fitness coach, I get the awesome privilege of seeing firsthand the magic that happens when we let our egos take a hike and rely on each other. What we can achieve when we come together. That’s when changes happens that we can’t always make on our own. Not because we’re weak, but because we are stronger together.
Every month I lead free, private, online groups full of help, support, accountability and humor. If you want to buy products, I’ll connect you, but no purchase is ever required – that’s not why I do this.
If you’re wondering if change is possible, let me tell you it is, for all of us.
I’d love to talk and share more; please reach out if you are interested in joining a group or have any questions. It’s never to late to find your village: firstname.lastname@example.org